Are you a 'guilty' parent?
By: Carl Schyberg - [family]
Posted 09/25/03
Are you a 'guilty' parent?
Most parents will at one time or another ask themselves this question, "Where did I go wrong?"
Many parents will suffer from not knowing the answer and feel rather bad about it. I'll give you the positive and best answer to this problem later in this article. Please read on.
The following are some of the problems many parents have faced and made a decision on.
Which playschool is the best for your child to start in? Whichever playschool you have chosen, you will have some doubts at one time or another. Was it right to spend that extra money to let your child attend a playschool, which meant driving the child quite a distance. Would a playschool closer to your home have been just as good, so the extra money could have been spent in other ways?
If you had chosen the closest playschool, would it not have been better to have chosen the more expensive one some distance away, although it meant a lot of traveling?
When starting 'proper' school, did you make the right choice for your child? Did you in fact have a choice? If you had lived a few miles away, would your child have had the chance of attending a better school (according to the information you have)?
When progressing to secondary school at age 11-13, was the right choice of school made for your child? Should you have asked for professional help in your decision? Or were you not able to influence the decision about which school, because the school authorities had made the decision on your behalf without consulting you?
Could you help your child to decide on further education or training as a basis for his/her future, or should you ask for professional help? Or should you trust Uncle Ted's advice about getting into media studies - 'a brilliant future' according to him - although your son/daughter would rather see a future as a car mechanic, nurse, care worker or something else?
Whichever decisions you make - and you will always make what you consider the best decisions at the time! - you will at a later date have your doubts.
Where did I go wrong? If I had supported the other possibility, would my son/daughter not have been happier today?
If I had stopped my son/daughter going out so much, would it have made any difference?
Whatever you do, most parents will at one time or another feel 'guilty'.
Here is the correct, common sense answer:
As a parent you will always make the decision, which you consider best at the time of making it. This is the best you can do! No regrets afterwards!
You have done your very best, when you made the decision. No regrets! You cannot change what has happened. No sleepless nights. Just be positive and make the very best from the facts as they are!
Copyright 2002 by Carl Schyberg
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